Desi to almost ABCD - Part Deux

You just moved in your apartment in the US. Sleep hits at the most weird times. You have no idea what time it is, since the sun sets at midnight and is up at 3 again. After about a week it sets in. The roommates are another joke. Trying to get used to people who are very different is hard. If they are from another country, you can might as well jump off a building.

Once the cooking turn starts, you get the scrap book your mom gave you. The experiment begins. It starts with a tragedy since you hold the knife on the wrong end and you are not used to anything apart from plates and cups. You meticulously follow the instructions. Now there's a problem. You don't know how the ingredients look like in the first place. After figuring that out, the food you cooked pretty much tastes like burnt rubber. Why? Because you don't know the difference between a table and a tea spoon, using the wrong one to measure the spices.

You buy a Dell laptop and a free phone even before your groceries. The registration for the classes are done and the first the day has come. You dress up in formals and head to class. The students think you are the professor and the actual professor comes in later wearing shorts. Embarrassed by that, later you look out for a good candidate as a girl friend. Too late since all the good one's are registered for along with the classes.

Now the part-time job hunt starts. All are taken by the Indians in your university. So you get a job at a gas station. Work 70 hours a week and at the end of the first semester, get a F in all the courses and take them all over again. Of course, you failed again since you were caught cheating in all your assignments, projects and tests. You escaped the first time because you copied the persons name too. You go and stand in line for the thanksgiving sale a month before for the $400 laptop, only to realise later that the store only had one and the guy ahead of you just bought it. You then buy other stuff to make yourself feel good which you will never ever use.

Every long weekend you rent cars and buy a video camera at best buy. Use it and return them after the trip. You head to temples for good food since the burnt rubber food and frozen parata's have gotten to you. You throw all your clothes bought in India since they don't go in this country. Your slang changes to "Dude" used before every sentence. You don't know what petrol means anymore. The mustaches are shaved off, pleated hair is banned, knighty's and lungi's hidden. Every weekend you decide to donate some money to Reliance. Once your dad is on the streets after paying your tuition costs, you graduate. So you Invite them and buy their tickets on your 0% APR credit card.

Just on the last week when your OPT gets expired you get a job finally and you buy a crappy car which breaks down twice by the time you get it home. You get your friends to take them for a ride in it, but the cars missing since you parked it next to the trash can and the trash people thought that was junk too.

Now your status is much higher and you shop at Kenneth, Banana Republic, Aldo, Express and erase stores like Old Navy, Payless from your memory. Now you get ready for your trip to India...

To be Continued...